Deciding to explain family estrangement to your children is one of parenting’s most difficult challenges. This article offers clear, age-appropriate guidance on how to explain estrangement to children without burdening them with adult complexities or fostering loyalty conflicts. Drawing on research by Karl Pillemer, PhD, and Carol Bruess, PhD, it helps parents navigate kids’ questions about missing grandparents with honesty and compassion. Practical strategies for protecting children from toxic grandparents while honoring their emotional needs are included.
Last reviewed: June 2026 by Annie Wright, LMFT
- The Question at the Kitchen Table You’ve Been Dreading
- What Children Actually Need to Know About Family Estrangement
- Child Development and What Kids Can Hold at Each Age
- Ages 2, 6: The Simple, True Thing to Say
- Ages 7, 12 and 13+: Honest, Developmentally Appropriate Conversations
- Both/And: You Can Protect Your Children and Still Be Honest
- The Systemic Lens: The Pressure to Keep the Peace for the Children’s Sake
- When the Estranged Person Reaches Directly for Your Children
- Frequently Asked Questions
Estrangement from a family member is a complex relational process that children understand differently depending on their developmental stage, with younger children relying on concrete, reassuring explanations centered on safety and love, while adolescents and adults can engage with more nuanced emotional and relational realities. Estrangement isn’t simply a decision or an event; it’s often the endpoint of a long process of boundary violations, unrepaired ruptures, or harm that couldn’t be addressed within the relationship. How parents communicate about estrangement to children in the family shapes whether children internalize it as evidence of their own instability or as an honest response to unsafe circumstances. In my work with driven women navigating these decisions, the hardest part is usually managing their own complexity while also protecting the children in their care.
In short: Children’s understanding of family estrangement shifts significantly with developmental stage, from the concrete safety-centered needs of early childhood through the capacity for relational nuance in adolescence, and how it’s explained shapes what they internalize about love and safety.
If you're the person in your family line who decided to stop the pattern, my self-paced course Parenting Past the Pattern is the practical work of doing it.
With more than 15,000 clinical hours working with women making painful decisions about family contact, I’ve seen how much the framing of estrangement for children matters to their long-term relational security. John Bowlby’s attachment research provides the foundational framework for understanding how children process relational rupture and absence (Bowlby 1969).
The Question at the Kitchen Table You’ve Been Dreading
It is a quiet moment at dinner when Elena (V1) notices the empty chair and asks, “Where’s Grandma? Why don’t we see her anymore?” This question, simple yet profound, can strike a parent like a thunderbolt. Children are perceptive; they sense when something is missing, and their need for answers is immediate and heartfelt. Yet, the complexity of family estrangement often feels like a tangled knot too difficult to unravel for young minds.
Many parents who have chosen or are considering estrangement find themselves caught in this tension: how to be truthful without overwhelming, how to protect their children’s innocence without lying, and how to maintain the family narrative without creating confusion or guilt. The kitchen table question is not just about one missing person; it opens a door to a difficult conversation about family, loyalty, and safety.
In my clinical experience, this moment is pivotal. The way parents respond shapes children’s emotional resilience and their understanding of healthy boundaries. Karl Pillemer, PhD, professor of human development at Cornell University and author of Fault Lines, highlights that family estrangement affects millions and often leaves collateral damage across generations. The children of estranged parents or grandparents bear a unique emotional weight that requires careful navigation.
Jordan (V2), a mother of two, shares her story: “When my 8-year-old started asking why Uncle David never comes around, I froze. I wanted to protect him from adult problems, but I also knew he deserved honesty. Finding the right words was like walking a tightrope.” This duality, honesty paired with protection, is the core challenge this article addresses.
What Children Actually Need to Know About Family Estrangement
Children do not need exhaustive details about adult conflicts or the painful history that led to family estrangement. What they need is the minimum truthful explanation that reassures their emotional safety and clarifies their place in the family system. Carol Bruess, PhD, a respected family communication researcher, emphasizes the importance of age-appropriate estrangement explanation that respects children’s developmental stage and emotional capacity.
At the heart of this explanation is threefold guidance:
1. Honesty without overburdening: Children are sensitive to deception and can feel alienated if they suspect they are being lied to. However, they do not need to carry adult grievances or conflicts.
2. Protecting emotional boundaries: Avoid speaking ill of the estranged grandparent in ways that create loyalty conflicts or make the child feel responsible for adult relationships.
3. Validating feelings: Children’s grief, confusion, or anger about the missing grandparent is real and deserves acknowledgment and support.
For example, telling kids about an estranged grandparent might sound like: “Grandma is someone who loves you, but she is not able to be with us right now. That’s okay, and it’s not your fault.” This kind of message offers truth framed with reassurance and emotional safety.
It is also crucial to avoid making children messengers or intermediaries between adults. This responsibility is too heavy and can cause lasting harm. Instead, parents can model healthy boundaries and provide children with a safe space to express their feelings.
For those interested in learning more about family estrangement dynamics and how to protect children, Annie Wright offers insightful resources such as Family Estrangement and Estrangement Grief.
Child Development and What Kids Can Hold at Each Age
Understanding children’s cognitive and emotional development is essential when deciding what to say about an estranged grandparent. Children’s ability to comprehend complex family dynamics evolves with age, and their questions often reflect their developmental stage.
Research by Carol Bruess, PhD, highlights that age-appropriate communication fosters trust and emotional security. She advises tailoring explanations to match children’s understanding, avoiding overwhelming them while still being truthful.
Below is a concise overview of what children can generally grasp at different stages:
Children’s capacity to understand family estrangement shifts significantly with age and cognitive development. Ages 2, 6 use concrete thinking and need simple, reassuring explanations centered on safety and love. Ages 7, 12 can handle more nuanced conversations that acknowledge feelings without blame. Ages 13+ can engage with complex emotional realities, including multiple perspectives and abstract concepts of relational pain.
In plain terms: What you tell your child about a missing grandparent or relative should fit what they’re actually able to hold. Which changes as they grow.
This developmental framework helps guide parents in crafting their responses. For example, when Elena’s 4-year-old asked about Grandma, she said, “Grandma loves you, but she can’t come visit right now.” When Jordan’s 10-year-old pressed for more, she explained, “Sometimes adults have disagreements that mean they don’t spend time together. But that doesn’t change how much you are loved.”
Parents should also be prepared for “kids questions about missing grandparent” to arise repeatedly, as children process these absences over time. Consistent, honest, and age-appropriate communication builds trust and emotional resilience.
For more on child development and family estrangement, see Annie Wright’s Therapy with Annie and Fixing the Foundations™ pages.
Ages 2, 6: The Simple, True Thing to Say
For toddlers and preschoolers, the explanation about an estranged grandparent must be extremely simple and grounded in reassurance. At this stage, children are concrete thinkers who need to feel safe and loved. Complex explanations about adult conflicts or family dynamics are beyond their capacity and can cause unnecessary fear or confusion.
Elena’s approach with her 3-year-old daughter illustrates this well. When asked about Grandma, she responded, “Grandma loves you very much, but she can’t come visit right now.” This response is truthful, avoids blame, and emphasizes the child’s security.
Carol Bruess, PhD, recommends using brief, positive language that avoids exposing children to adult tensions. For example, phrases like “Grandma is not able to be here,” or “Sometimes grown-ups have things they need to work out,” provide a gentle acknowledgment without detail.
It is also important to maintain routines and physical closeness to reinforce the child’s sense of stability. Children in this age group do not need to know the reasons for estrangement, only that they are safe and loved.
Parents should watch for signs of grief or confusion, such as increased clinginess, tantrums, or questions about the missing person. These feelings are normal and can be soothed with empathy and consistent reassurance.
Here are some examples of what to say and what to avoid for ages 2, 6:
| What to Say | What to Avoid |
|---|---|
| “Grandma loves you very much, but she can’t visit right now.” | “Grandma is mad at us.” |
| “Sometimes grown-ups need space to feel better.” | “Grandma doesn’t want to see you because you misbehaved.” |
| “You are safe and loved.” | “You have to tell Grandma sorry.” |
Elena also found that children benefit from storytelling and play that help process feelings indirectly. For instance, reading books about family differences or drawing pictures of loved ones can open gentle pathways for children to express their emotions.
For parents navigating these early conversations, additional support can be found in Annie Wright’s Complex Trauma Treatment and Connect pages, which offer tools for fostering safety and emotional regulation.
Ages 7, 12 and 13+: Honest, Developmentally Appropriate Conversations
As children grow beyond early childhood, their cognitive and emotional capacities expand, allowing for more nuanced conversations about family estrangement. Carol Bruess, PhD, a family communication researcher, emphasizes that honesty paired with developmentally appropriate language fosters trust and emotional safety. For children aged 7 to 12, this means providing clear but gentle explanations that respect their growing curiosity without overwhelming them with adult complexities.
For example, you might say to a 9-year-old, “Grandma and I have some disagreements that make it hard for us to spend time together right now. It’s not because of anything you did, and I’m here to answer any questions you have.” This approach acknowledges the reality without assigning blame or inviting the child into family conflicts.
For teenagers, like Jordan (V2), conversations can be more detailed, as their ability to understand complex emotions and abstract reasoning is more developed. A 16-year-old can handle discussions about the reasons for estrangement, such as differences in values, hurt feelings, or boundaries that were crossed. However, it’s crucial to maintain respect for all parties and avoid negative or disparaging remarks that could create loyalty conflicts.
A communication approach tailored to a child’s age and emotional maturity, delivering truthful information without causing undue distress or confusion.
According to Karl Pillemer, PhD, professor of human development at Cornell University and author of Fault Lines, children are deeply affected by family estrangement, even if they do not fully grasp its complexities. His research underscores the importance of providing explanations that align with the child’s developmental stage while protecting their sense of security and belonging.
When children ask “Why don’t we see Grandma anymore?” or “What happened to Uncle David?”, use language that is honest yet free of adult blame or conflict. For example:
| Age Group | What to Say | What to Avoid |
|---|---|---|
| 7, 9 years | “Sometimes adults have disagreements that are hard to fix. Right now, Grandma and I aren’t spending time together.” | Avoid detailed stories about fights or negative judgments. |
| 10, 12 years | “Grandma and I have some differences that make it difficult for us to get along. It’s not your fault, and you don’t need to take sides.” | Avoid making the child feel responsible or like a messenger. |
| 13+ years | “Family relationships can be complicated. Sometimes people disagree on important things, and it’s healthier for us to have some distance right now.” | Avoid speaking ill of the estranged person or pressuring the teen to choose sides. |
“Children sense when they are being shielded by half-truths. Honest, age-appropriate conversations build resilience and trust.”
, Annie Wright, Trauma-Informed Therapist
When children express emotions like confusion, sadness, or anger about the absence of a grandparent, validate their feelings without burdening them with adult conflicts. For example, “It’s okay to feel sad or mad. I’m here to listen whenever you want to talk.” This helps children process their grief and supports emotional regulation.
Both/And: You Can Protect Your Children and Still Be Honest
Balancing honesty with protection is one of the most challenging aspects of explaining estrangement to children. Both/And thinking allows parents to hold these sometimes conflicting needs simultaneously. You can protect your children from harmful adult conflicts while also respecting their right to truthful information.
Research by Carol Bruess highlights that children benefit most when caregivers avoid secrecy and deception, which can erode trust and lead to greater confusion. Yet, exposing children to adult disputes or negative characterizations of family members can create loyalty conflicts and emotional distress.
To navigate this tension, focus on minimum truthful explanations that are clear, simple, and free from blame. For example, saying “Grandma is not spending time with us right now because of some grown-up problems” is truthful without divulging details that could be harmful.
Protecting children also means avoiding using them as messengers or intermediaries between estranged adults. Children should never be tasked with delivering messages, asking for reconciliation, or mediating conflicts.
Elena (V1) shares her experience: “I learned the hard way that when I involved my children in adult issues, it only added to their anxiety. Now, I focus on keeping their world stable and safe, even if that means some things remain unsaid until they’re older.”
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Honesty and protection also extend to managing children’s grief and confusion. Encourage open dialogue, validate feelings, and provide reassurance that they are loved and safe. This approach fosters emotional resilience and prevents feelings of abandonment or self-blame.
For further guidance, see family estrangement resources and support for estrangement grief.
The Systemic Lens: The Pressure to Keep the Peace for the Children’s Sake
Family estrangement is rarely an isolated issue; it involves systemic dynamics that ripple across relationships and generations. One common pressure parents face is the expectation to “keep the peace” or maintain family unity for the children’s sake. While this impulse is understandable, it can sometimes do more harm than good.
Attempting to force reconciliation or maintain contact with a toxic grandparent “for the kids” may expose children to ongoing emotional harm, confusion, or divided loyalties. Karl Pillemer’s research shows that unresolved family conflicts often lead to chronic stress and fractured attachment bonds, which can have lasting effects on children’s wellbeing.
Instead, parents can adopt a systemic perspective that prioritizes the child’s emotional safety and autonomy over imposed family harmony. This means recognizing when boundaries are necessary and honoring them, even if it disrupts traditional family expectations.
Maintaining a “minimum relationship” or setting firm boundaries with estranged family members is a protective act, not a failure. It models healthy self-care and teaches children that relationships should be based on respect and safety.
For parents struggling with these systemic pressures, professional support can be invaluable. Therapy and family coaching can help navigate complex feelings, societal expectations, and family narratives.
More on systemic approaches and boundary-setting is available at Fixing the Foundations and Complex Trauma Treatment.
When the Estranged Person Reaches Directly for Your Children
One of the most delicate challenges in family estrangement is managing contact initiated by the estranged grandparent or relative towards your children. This can be confusing and emotionally fraught for both parent and child.
Best practice is to maintain clear boundaries and protect your children from becoming entangled in adult conflicts. If an estranged grandparent attempts to contact your child, carefully evaluate the context and safety before allowing any interaction.
Children should never be placed in a position where they feel responsible for maintaining or repairing the relationship. It’s appropriate to explain to the child, in an age-appropriate way, that sometimes adults need space from each other, and that you will handle any communications.
Jordan (V2) recalls, “When my estranged grandfather reached out to me directly, my parent helped me understand why it wasn’t safe or healthy to respond. That support made a huge difference in how I processed my feelings.”
When managing these situations, consider consulting professional guidance on boundary-setting and co-parenting strategies. Resources like the Going No Contact Complete Guide and the Grey Rock Method can provide practical tools to maintain safety and emotional balance.
Ultimately, your role as a parent is to safeguard your child’s emotional wellbeing while navigating these complex family dynamics with compassion and clarity.
In navigating the delicate balance of honesty and protection, the stories of individuals like Elena and Jordan offer valuable insights. Elena (V1) chose to be transparent with her children about her estranged relationship with their grandfather, carefully framing the conversation to emphasize that sometimes adults have complicated feelings that don’t always resolve. She explained that while she loved her children deeply, there were reasons why she and their grandfather did not communicate, and that these reasons were about adult issues rather than anything the children had done. This approach allowed Elena’s children to feel included without burdening them with adult conflicts. Conversely, Jordan (V2) opted for a more gradual disclosure, sharing limited information initially and inviting questions as his children grew older. Jordan emphasized the importance of listening to his children’s feelings and reassuring them that estrangement did not reflect their worth or the family’s love. Both approaches highlight the “both/and” mindset: protecting children’s emotional wellbeing while honoring their right to understand family dynamics in an age-appropriate way.
Understanding the systemic and cultural context in which estrangement unfolds is crucial in appreciating the complex pressures caregivers face. In many cultures, family cohesion and respect for elders are deeply ingrained values, making the idea of estrangement not only emotionally fraught but also socially stigmatizing. Caregivers may feel caught between wanting to shield their children from hurt and the societal expectation to maintain family unity at all costs. Additionally, systemic factors such as intergenerational trauma, mental health stigmas, and differing cultural narratives about conflict and forgiveness heavily influence how families navigate estrangement. For example, in communities where silence about family issues is normative, even acknowledging an estranged grandparent can be taboo. Recognizing these layers helps caregivers approach the conversation with sensitivity to both internal family dynamics and external cultural pressures, allowing for more compassionate and context-aware communication strategies.
When an estranged grandparent reaches out directly to children, the situation becomes even more complex. It is important for caregivers to establish clear boundaries that prioritize the children’s emotional safety while respecting their autonomy. Practically, this can involve setting guidelines about the frequency and mode of contact, whether through letters, phone calls, or supervised visits. Communicating these boundaries firmly and kindly to the grandparent helps prevent confusion or emotional strain for the children. Additionally, caregivers should prepare their children for these interactions by discussing what to expect and encouraging them to express their feelings openly. If contact is not in the children’s best interest, caregivers have the responsibility to protect them, explaining that sometimes adults need space to heal and that this is not a reflection of the children’s value. In all cases, maintaining open dialogue within the immediate family supports children in processing their experiences and fosters resilience amid complex family relationships.
Practically speaking, one useful approach for caregivers is to create a “family storybook” or digital journal that chronicles the family’s history, including the reality of estrangement, in a gentle and age-appropriate way. This tool can serve as a reference for children to understand their family narrative without relying solely on verbal explanations, which may change over time. It also provides space to include positive memories or stories about the estranged grandparent if appropriate, helping children hold a balanced view. Caregivers can invite children to contribute drawings, questions, or reflections to this storybook, making it a collaborative and evolving resource. This practice not only supports transparency but also empowers children to process their feelings creatively and at their own pace. Over time, the storybook can be revisited and updated, reflecting the family’s ongoing journey and reinforcing the message that family relationships are complex but navigable with love and honesty.
Deciding to explain family estrangement to your children is one of the most delicate conversations a parent can face. As Karl Pillemer, PhD, professor of human development at Cornell University and author of Fault Lines, emphasizes, children are astute observers who sense when they are being shielded from the truth. Yet, Carol Bruess, PhD, a family communication researcher specializing in age-appropriate messaging, reminds us that honesty must be balanced with developmental readiness. This balance is critical when addressing the absence of an estranged grandparent or other family members, as children’s understanding and emotional needs vary dramatically by age.
Elena, a mother of two young children, found herself navigating this terrain after her mother stopped contacting the family. When her curious 4-year-old asked why Grandma never came to birthday parties anymore, Elena struggled to find words that would neither confuse nor upset her child. Meanwhile, Jordan, parenting a teenager, wrestled with how to talk openly about the fractured relationship with Uncle David without provoking resentment or placing undue emotional burden on her 16-year-old son. These real-life scenarios highlight the necessity of tailoring explanations to the child’s cognitive and emotional development.
For toddlers and preschoolers (ages 3-5), the minimum truthful explanation should be simple, concrete, and free from adult conflict. Pillemer advises saying something like, “Grandma isn’t able to visit right now,” or “Grandma is busy and can’t come over.” This avoids introducing complex relational dynamics that children cannot yet process. At this stage, children need reassurance that they are loved and safe, and that the absence is not their fault. Avoid attributing blame or involving them in adult disputes, as this can create confusion and anxiety.
Children aged 6-9 generally have a growing capacity for understanding cause and effect but still interpret information concretely. Here, parents can introduce slightly more context, such as “Grandma and I don’t get along very well, so she doesn’t come to visit.” However, Bruess cautions against negative statements about the estranged person that could create loyalty conflicts. Instead, frame the situation as a grown-up problem that doesn’t affect the child’s relationship with either adult. It’s important to emphasize that they are not responsible for fixing the relationship or delivering messages. This age group may express confusion or sadness, so parents should invite questions and acknowledge feelings without overwhelming them with details.
For preteens and early adolescents (ages 10-13), there is potential for more nuanced discussions. Jordan’s experience with her 12-year-old son illustrates this well. She found it helpful to explain that sometimes adults have disagreements that are hard to resolve and lead to spending less time together. She emphasized that while she and Uncle David are not close, her son is free to form his own relationship with his uncle if he wishes. This approach respects the child’s growing autonomy and critical thinking skills, while maintaining boundaries around adult conflicts.
Teenagers (14-18) are capable of understanding complex emotional dynamics and moral ambiguity. They may seek more detailed explanations or express anger and frustration about the estrangement. Parents should be prepared for candid conversations that acknowledge the pain and complexity involved. As Pillemer notes, adolescents benefit from hearing that estrangement is a difficult decision made by adults for various reasons, and that it is not a reflection of the child’s worth or role. Jordan found it helpful to share her own feelings without burdening her son with guilt or responsibility, reinforcing that family relationships are complicated and sometimes painful.
Across all ages, it is crucial to avoid making the child a messenger between estranged family members. This can place an unfair emotional load on the child and exacerbate loyalty conflicts. If the estranged person attempts direct contact with the child, parents should carefully evaluate the situation. According to Bruess, maintaining clear boundaries and protecting the child’s emotional safety is paramount. Parents might consider supervised contact or involving a neutral third party if contact is deemed appropriate, always prioritizing the child’s well-being.
“Children who don’t feel loved will do anything to earn that love. You need a distraction? I’ll become a project. You need to not be sad? I’ll be happy enough for the whole family. You need me to be less of a burden? I won’t even make a sound when I chew.”
, Katherine Morgan Schafler, The Perfectionist’s Guide to Losing Control, 2023
Handling a child’s grief, confusion, or anger about an absent grandparent or relative requires validating their emotions and providing consistent support. Elena learned to acknowledge her younger child’s sadness by saying, “It’s okay to feel sad when we miss someone,” and offering comfort through physical affection and routine. For older children, parents might encourage journaling, counseling, or conversations with trusted adults. Normalizing mixed feelings helps children process the loss without internalizing blame.
It is also important to recognize the broader cultural and systemic context of estrangement. In some families, estrangement may carry stigma or be associated with unresolved trauma, mental health issues, or intergenerational patterns. Parents might benefit from resources such as Annie Wright’s Family Dynamics and Healing or Support for Parents pages, which provide guidance on navigating complex family relationships with empathy and resilience.
Ultimately, how to explain estrangement to children is a deeply personal decision shaped by family values, the nature of the estrangement, and each child’s unique temperament. Prioritizing emotional safety, offering age-appropriate truths, and modeling respectful communication can help children cope with the absence of a loved one without carrying unnecessary burdens. As both Elena and Jordan have discovered, there is no perfect script, but there is profound power in approaching these conversations with honesty, compassion, and patience.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What do I say when my child asks why we don’t see Grandma anymore?
A: Use simple, truthful language appropriate for your child’s age. For young children, explain that sometimes adults have disagreements that make it hard to spend time together. Reassure them it’s not their fault and answer their questions honestly but gently.
Q: At what age can children understand estrangement?
A: Children’s understanding evolves with age. Around 7, 12 years, they begin to grasp that relationships can be complicated, and teenagers can handle more detailed explanations. Tailor your conversation to their developmental level to foster comprehension and emotional safety.
Q: What if my child is angry at me for the estrangement?
A: Validate your child’s feelings and provide space for their anger or confusion. Explain that sometimes adults make difficult decisions to protect the family’s wellbeing. Encourage open dialogue and reassure them of your love and support.
Q: What if my estranged parent tries to contact my children directly?
A: Maintain clear boundaries and manage all communications. Explain to your children, in an age-appropriate way, that you will handle contact with the estranged person. Protect your children from adult conflicts and avoid placing responsibility on them.
Q: Should I ever let my children have a relationship with the estranged grandparent on their own terms?
A: This depends on safety, emotional health, and family dynamics. Carefully assess whether contact is beneficial or harmful. Prioritize your child’s wellbeing, and consider professional guidance before allowing unsupervised or direct relationships.
Related Reading
1. Karl Pillemer, PhD, Family Estrangement: A Problem Hiding in Plain Sight, Cornell Chronicle, 2020.
2. Carol Bruess, PhD, Age-Appropriate Family Communication on Estrangement, AnnieWright.com.
3. Joshua Coleman, PhD, How to Repair a Family Rift, Family Therapy Resources.
4. Annie Wright, Navigating Estrangement Grief, AnnieWright.com.
5. Annie Wright, Going No Contact: The Complete Guide, AnnieWright.com.
6. Annie Wright, The Grey Rock Method for Managing Toxic Family Members, AnnieWright.com.
References
Peer-Reviewed Research (Vancouver)
- Gilligan M, Suitor JJ, Pillemer K. Patterns and Processes of Intergenerational Estrangement: A Qualitative Study of Mother-Adult Child Relationships Across Time. Res Aging. 2022;44(5-6):436-447. doi:10.1177/01640275211036966. PMID: 34551648.
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Annie Wright is a licensed psychotherapist (LMFT #95719) and trauma-informed executive coach with over 15,000 clinical hours. She works with driven women. Including Silicon Valley leaders, physicians, and entrepreneurs. In repairing the psychological foundations beneath their impressive lives. Annie is the founder and former CEO of Evergreen Counseling, a multimillion-dollar trauma-informed therapy center she built, scaled, and successfully exited. A regular contributor to Psychology Today, her expert commentary has appeared in USA Today, Forbes, Business Insider, Inc., NBC, and The Information. She is currently writing her first book with W.W. Norton.
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