As a follow up to my letter to you two weeks ago where we explored the question, “What if I never meet The One?”, today I wanted to address another question that can keep many 20, 30, and 40-something women up at night: not knowing if you want to have children or not.

In my opinion, the topic of feeling ambivalent about having children does not get nearly enough attention in our society but it’s a topic that countless women face, today likely more than ever.

So in this post, I’m going to address the issue when you don’t know if you want to have children. But also provide you with a long list of prompts you can use to work through any ambivalence you may have about this topic.

And if you’re one of my readers who’s not ambivalent about having children – maybe you’re crystal clear you do or don’t want them, or maybe you even have children already – I still encourage you to read the post to learn some inquiries and questions that might help out someone you know and love who is feeling ambivalent and very confused. Consider it a cheat sheet to help you know what to empathetically say and ask the next time your little sister/friend/college roommate vulnerably discloses that she’s possibly-maybe ambivalent about having kids…

Join me to keep reading this latest letter from the archive.