Sad and angry not only from the gathering of white supremacists and Neo-Nazis in Charlottesville and the hateful rhetoric they spew and represent but in the pitiful lack of leadership of condemnation of these events from the highest office in the land.

This week has been a hard week for many of us.

It’s been a hard week because it’s a reminder of so many things.

A reminder that the ancient wound of racism, supremacy, and violence (in thought and in action) is wide open. And still festering in this country.

A reminder that our current President does not stand (nor take a stand) firmly rooted in esteemable morals and good judgment.

A reminder that even our family, friend, and acquaintance groups may be divided in themselves about how (if at all) to respond or react to this.

This week has been a reminder of so much personal and collective pain, a reminder of so many deeply entrenched, destructive systemic issues that seem to have no solution.

You may be feeling overwhelmed and wanting to withdraw from social media, the news, even from folks in your life. This is okay…

You may be feeling righteous anger and planning to show up at counter protests or peaceful demonstrations. This is okay…

You may be feeling compelled to act in social media conversations, to post, to write, to do something to show your stance and to influence the opinions of those around you. This is okay…

You may not know how you feel or even how or if you want to respond to anything that’s happening right now. This is okay…

What I want to say to you right now is this: We all have different responses to stress. And there is no right or wrong way about how to respond or how to take care of yourself.

Especially in the immediate aftermath of painful, traumatic events like Charlottesville.

There is no one right way to respond. Our individual trauma histories, our varying emotional capacities, our widely diverse logistical time and physical capabilities dictate how much and in what way we can tolerate showing up for or even metabolizing stressors like what happened this week.

So please, if you’re feeling a pressure to act or respond or be a certain way, remember to check in with yourself and see what your capacity and what your boundaries are around this.

Only you can know what’s good and right and true for you right now whether this is tuning into the news, tuning out to the news, having conversations about what’s happening in America, being on or off social media, or withdrawing and tending to your heart and soul and your small corner of the world.