Tuck it away in some digital folder, bookmark it, soak in the words of comfort and then repeat them back to yourself the next time you find your mind reeling, your chest fiery with anxiety, your mind whirling with wondering, your emotions big and raw.

I want to share with you a few words of comfort for very hard days.

Honey. Today sucks.

Today is really, really hard.

You didn’t expect this would happen.

Even if you had a sneaking suspicion this might come to pass, you didn’t seriously entertain it and you certainly didn’t make plans around it.

Now you’ve been caught off guard, and things that once felt comfortingly counted on, stable and secure in your life don’t feel that way anymore.

Last night you may have reached some peace before sleep only to wake up with your mind reeling again, feeling like you’re waking up to a bad dream.

“It really did happen, didn’t it? I didn’t just dream it…”

You feel worried, you feel angry, or sad, probably all of the above.

You don’t know how you’re going to fix this and you’re jumping at the bit to take action, do things to make this situation better.

Maybe there are things you can do, and it’s important when to know when to be actionable.

Make a list then, of what’s in your control right now, sit down and execute against that list.

Do what you can but also remember this: things come undone in life.

It’s hard, but it’s also inevitable.

And when they do, we also have to make space for the feelings that come with the shattering, the wobbliness, the undoing of it all.

Try to stay aware of using action to numb yourself, to prevent yourself from actually feeling your feelings about this.

I’m here to tell you: you need to feel your way through this as much as you need to take action through this.

Let it be okay that you feel angry at them/he/she/it/everyone.

Let it be okay if you feel like giving up.

Like you want a refund on adulting.

(No one told us when we were kids that half of adulting is, apparently, just putting out fires and most of the time feeling incapable of doing so.)

Let it be okay that you feel overwhelmed, that you feel stretched to the max.

Let it be okay that you have no idea what the next step will be, where that needed extra time to deal with this new unexpected thing will come from in your already way too overbooked schedule.

Can you please allow yourself to feel all of those things: mad, angry, scared, overwhelmed, sad?

It’s going to ultimately help you if you can make space for your feelings even as you sit down at the laptop and make that to-do list.