“Resilience is more than bouncing back. It’s being able to adapt in the face of adversity and come through it stronger and more engaged than ever.” – Brené Brown, Ph.D.
In this last piece in our five-part series (here are parts 1, 2, 3, and 4) on the fundamental tools that should be in our self-care tool chests when we come from relational trauma backgrounds, we explore our final, possibly juiciest topic: resilience tools.
What do resilience tools even mean?
Think of it this way: coping tools are what we use in the moment when we feel a sudden surge of Big Feelings.
Resilience tools, on the other hand, are what we utilize over a longer period when we encounter setbacks that trigger difficult emotions and cause us to feel demoralized.
These emotions may not overwhelm us, but they still require processing to help us recover, adapt, and navigate through challenging times.
In essence, resilience tools involve strategies and practices that enable us to bounce back from adversity, adjust when faced with changes, and attempt to thrive despite difficulties.
These tools contribute to a “growth mindset,” distinguishing them from the basics of biopsychosocial health, emotional regulation techniques, and immediate coping skills.
Resilience tools, as you can see, also play a very important role in our mental health which is why I think they take up a whole drawer in four proverbial self-care tool chest.
Why are resilience tools important for our mental health?
Resilience tools help us build emotional strength by encouraging positive thinking patterns and fostering a sense of control and agency over our lives.
Think of it like training in the gym to develop more stamina and pack on muscle mass to gain strength.
By regularly practicing these tools, we can grow our capacities to better manage stress, reduce anxiety, and improve our ability to handle life’s challenges.
All of this may mean we rely on those coping skills less and less.
What’s the science behind this (versus just my creative gym analogy)?
The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions suggests that positive emotions enhance resilience by expanding the range of potential coping strategies, which can protect against stress and reduce anxiety and depressive symptoms.
Research has found that using positive coping strategies, such as thinking positively and seeking help, can reduce anxiety, depression, and aggression by building resilience.
